Scale this morning read: 252. Had to read it a couple times to make sure.
Woooohoooo! I’m doing something right!
I posted this on a horse forum (of all places to post a CF type rant…) in a topic that was discussing why people can’t seem to understand the lack of desire to have children. These are my thoughts on that lovely subject..
Society reveres having kids. Pregnancy and childbirth is seen as the ultimate..and sometimes *only* right of passage for women. If you don’t have kids or subscribe to the idea that having children is the most wonderful thing on the planet; you’re weird, selfish, sick, immature and any number of things that people can come up with.
The baby/child worship and centricity in this world is sickening and very disturbing. I saw a commercial about cervical cancer the other day, and the first thing mentioned was how “she may not be able to have kids”. That’s devastating? How about the fact that she may DIE. That it could KILL HER. Media/doctors/etc tell people to quit smoking for your children, lose weight for your children, fight the cancer for you children. What about yourself? What about wanting to live a long and healthy life for YOURSELF?
I recently went to the local Women’s Health Clinic to get a low cost IUD. I saw close to 40-50 women in that their EACH time I was there. And every.single.one had at least one child with them, was pregnant, or was talking about their children. ALL of these women were in their late teens/early twenties. One of the nurses told me I was the most intelligent young women she had ever seen working there – and she’d been working there for YEARS. How sad is that? 40 women per day, 5 days a week is 200 women a week. 200 women is roughly 800 women per month. 9600 women a year. Out of almost 10,000 women. I was the most intelligent young women she’d come across in that clinic. That’s sad. That’s heartbreaking.
If society didn’t worship babies and motherhood, if choosing to not have children was seen as a valid choice was actually portrayed in the media; I bet more women would wait. Wait until they had finished school, were financially stable and in loving, long term relationships (and that doesn’t mean they HAVE to be married). I bet there would be less children in this world being beaten, abused and killed by parents that believed the lie that it’s different when their your own. It’s NOT always different, sometimes, most of the time, it’s the same.
Lest anyone think I hate children and motherhood; I don’t. I think kids can be awesome. I can’t wait to share my passion and love for horses with a child (not my own, someone else’s!) I think mothers; the ones that give of themselves selflessly and don’t except praise and congratulations and worship everywhere they turn; are wonderful. I think they make the world a better place by raising productive members of society.
I canceled my gym membership. Too much money. The fiance and I are moving May 7th, the apartment complex has a small gym. I’ve decided I’m packing my scale in a box and ignoring it until after we move. I’m obsessing. Which is not healthy.
Food wise…doing MUCH better. Have cut down drastically on caffeine, and the overall amount of calories I eat. Weekends are hard, because I’m at home. During the week is great, too busy at work to really think about food.
Meh. I’ll get better.
Sooo, last week I failed; miserably. I didn’t go to the gym..at all. This week, I’ve been pretty good. Went Monday and today (Tuesday), won’t go tomorrow (doctor’s appointment that’ll probably knock me on my ass).
My knee is improving, guess this is progress.
Yep, finally. Time to track my journey from weighing 250 pounds (yes, I’m actually posting my weight on the interwebs, oh noes!) to weighing 135 lbs (give or take a few pounds, the ultimate goal is to be healthy…).
So lemme take you back in time for a minute.
What I looked like at 17/18:
A headshot of what I look like now…
Depressing eh? I agree.
What have I done so far?
-Changed my diet. Still need to make further changes, but we’re getting there.
-Joined the gym. I should be going at LEAST three days a week.
Tips, tricks and words of encouragement are welcome. If you’re going to be a jerk, stay away.
I stumbled across a topic on a mommy board last night about strollers. The poster that started the topic couldn’t really believe how unhelpful people are when you have a stroller (not opening doors, not moving out of the way).
1. I don’t open doors for strollers. Why? I’ve been run over by them more times then I care to count. Having a stroller loaded with kids, coats, shopping and any other manner of things rammed into your knee HURTS damnit. Not opening doors for them ensures that I stay far away from them.
2. I can’t move out of the way if I don’t know you’re there. Really, I can’t. A woman in mall a couple of years back got quite indigent with me when I wouldn’t move out of her way. Apparently she’d been standing behind me for “FIVE WHOLE MINUTES” waiting for me to magically move out of the way. The problem with her standing there for “FIVE WHOLE MINUTES” was that – I didn’t know she was there. She never said a single word to me. Trust me, if I KNOW you’re there, I will move, as quick as I can. I don’t want to be near a stroller anymore then I want to be next to a poisonous snake.
Some of the other posters on this thread had a complaint to make about the absolutely gigantic “SUV” strollers. I agree with them. Whole heartedly. Unless your traversing over rough terrain (and lets face it, how many parents are actually going to do that?), there’s no need to have strollers that are built like an off road vehicle. Other posters countered that the umbrella strollers were “too small” “couldn’t fit all their stuff” and “were more cost effective” (HOW?!)
The third thing that jumped out at me as I read on in sordid fascination, was a complain from a few women about how stores are not “stroller accessible”, that their preciouses could easily reach out and grab things off the shelves. One woman said that she regularly found clothing tags in the seat of her son’s stroller when she got done shopping. K, so, YOU can’t control your kid? And you want the store to change their layout (thereby making the amount of merchandise they can fit in the store less) so that you don’t have to do your JOB; which is parent your kid? Another woman pointed out that if a store was not stroller accessible then it wasn’t wheelchair accessible either. I beg to differ. Wheelchairs have great maneuverability then the mammoth size strollers that are so popular. They also don’t contain toddler brats with lazy parents that grab at anything and everything.
I understand that strollers are great to keep tired and cranky kids contained. But really, buy the smaller ones. They do exist; even if you have two kids! My mom had a two seater for my brothers that was no more wider then a one seater, just longer. And it worked perfectly! And if you have more then two kids that need to be in a stroller at a time? Maybe you should slow down a bit. The human species IS supposed to be smarter then rabbits.
Something I’ve noticed that’s becoming prevalent across the interwebs and the world is the changing of word definitions. The unrelenting attacks that come when you dare to use a word that parents have deemed to mean something else, the way it’s supposed to be used is quite frankly, ridiculous.
When I post on forums and blogs and I don’t know the gender of a kid I use “it” in place of “he” or “she”. I don’t get close enough to infants or pay enough attention to very small kids to figure out if they’re a boy or girl. If I can hear a kid screaming at the top of it’s lungs I’m most certainly not going to hunt it down and figure out what gender it is. I’m going to run the other way. I know of many other childfree that use “it” the same way.
The angst that parents display at having their precious darlings called “it” is quite funny really. They inevitably whine about how their child is not an inanimate object so is not an it. Well, yes, yes it is an it. Because I don’t know the gender! And I don’t care!
According to Merriam Webster, one of the many definitions of it is:
a person or animal whose sex is unknown or disregarded ,
1. Unknown – means I just plain don’t know.
2. Disregarded – means I just plain don’t CARE.
So, parents, seriously. Just chill. Your darlings will not suffer severe psychological damage because some stranger they never have and never will meet has called them an it on the internet.